Saturday, 16 September 2017

Autumn update

And so it is September
Where did the summer go?
I finished up work last Thursday 
So am a free little bird again 
I thoroughly enjoyed work this year
Once I got in to it
And got over my anxiety
I relaxed 
And just went with the flow
No panic
No stress
No worrying and questioning myself 
Not taking myself too seriously 
And just enjoying it
It's a lovely place to work
I made new friends 
My manager is a very fair and sound person 
And there is a very friendly and informal atmosphere 
My manger asked me if I was willing to do some work in the residential home for the elderly 
So of course I said yes 
It will most likely be covering people's holidays etc
But it's a start 
And a chance to get to know the residents and staff
So that's some good news
I finished work on Thursday 
Which was also my birthday
A double celebration 
For my birthday 
Myself Mam and Fintan went for lunch 
And on Saturday my sister brought me for lunch 
I got some lovely gifts
A parka jacket
Riding boots 
A t-shirt
I was well and truly spoiled 
I know a lot of people don't like birthdays 
But I love them
Maybe because you are made a fuss of in my house
Finishing up work was bitter sweet
It's nice to have more time 
To spend with my dogs and Coco
But I do miss it
I miss the people
The buzz of service 
Meeting new people
Our holiday centre is a very special place
It's run by a charity called St. Vincent de Paul
And it arranges holidays for those who ordinarily wouldn't be able to afford a holiday
It's nice to think we are helping people 
And we do our best to make their holiday a memorable one 
Next year I plan to work full time 
Which will be a challenge 
But one I really want to go for 
I find working part time 
I wasn't as clued in as I was when working full time
Like everything 
There are advantages and disadvantages 

I didn't get to visit Coco as much this summer
But now the season is over 
I am back to seeing him as often as his can
He is doing well
There are sheep in his field now 
And himself and Lea have great fun chasing them around the field
He saw the farrier this week
And was as good as gold
Our farrier offered to take Coco for a week
To begin breaking him in
This is fantastic news! 
And I am so grateful to the farrier
To think that I could ride Coco at some point in the future?
That right there is amazing
I can't wait!
I am still riding a couple of times a week
And slowly but surely improving
I'm learning all the time
The horses are great teachers 
Star my buddy is such a handsome boy

In other news 
I am heading away on a little trip tomorrow 
I am treating the parental unit to a three night break away in a hotel
I am going on a riding trek
And the 'rents are going to chill out
I'm very excited for the holiday
And I'm delighted to be able to treat my parents 
And after a summer of working hard 
It's a nice way to finish it off
I can't lie
I'm a bit nervous to ride a new horse 
But I will do my best 
And that's all I can do

Healthy wise 
Mentally I am doing just fine 
I'm finally in a place where I am content just to be me 
I don't want her bum
Her boobs
Her legs 
I am happy enough with my own thank you very much 
My body has changed a lot 
But I'm getting used to it
I feel a long way away from my ED
It's not something I think about 
It's not something that takes up space in my life or my head
I am no longer Ruby the anorectic
Or even Ruby in recovery 
I am just Ruby
And that is enough 
Up until quite recently 
When I met new people 
I felt compelled to tell them my history
Almost to explain why I am the way I am
To let people know what nice been through 
Now 
I don't feel like that at all 
I don't make a point of telling people 
If it comes up fair enough 
But I don't deliberately bring it up
Progress friends..

So
That's it for another month
I hope y'all doing ok
Take care and stay well
See you on the next post...

7 comments:

  1. This year is flying by, I feel like just last week it was winter and now we're already back in pumpkin spice season.

    It's great to hear you're doing so well. I hope you get to ride Coco soon!
    xx

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  2. I love this.
    Have a lovely time away, I hope you and the parents all enjoy it immensely.
    Sending lots of love, xx.

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  3. I'm glad you're doing well.

    Enjoy your riding boots. :)

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  4. It sounds like you're doing really well. Keep up the hard work lovely <3

    xx

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  5. Enjoy your own much earned holiday dear. Hugs to you.

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  6. Wonderful update! So happy for you! :) :) :)

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Thank you for leaving some love x